# How do I verify if my phone is being monitored?



## CrimsonRain (Nov 16, 2017)

Because I am apparently ridiculous and can't NOT write a novel .. for those who have little patience for people like me .. please feel free to skip down to the third paragraph. Believe me, I frustrate myself more than I frustrate others.

I've been doing some extensive google searches and came across this website. I'm kind of desperate and not getting much as far as answers go. I left my ex about 6 months ago, and my life has just been hell, as I feel like he's watching every move I make. I have good reason to believe he has some kind of access to my phone and maybe I'm paranoid, but now I'm suspicious too, that he has possibly accessed my parents' phones as well. This is much less likely .. but a concern non the less. I just want to feel free of him and I don't think I can do that until I know with out a doubt that he does not have a method of monitoring me or my family. I have an iPhone 6s Plus. He's had physical access to it before if he really wanted it, but I never caught him accessing it. I am still on the same phone plan as he is and I know how dumb that sounds, however I'm trying to avoid upsetting him any further, as he's acting like a delusional psychopath and he's actually really scaring me. He's also holding my belongings hostage and I was hoping to appeal to him enough to at least get my things out of his .. oh wait, our house really. And unfortunately, the police can't help me. I have to sue him for MY belongings because it's a civil matter .. or so I'm told. I'm fed up and a bit bitter, if you can't tell. Anyhow, I finally realized that I don't have much option otherwise, so I ordered a new phone and will be activating it once it arrives. He's going to pissed when he finds out that I am no longer paying for that line .. which he removed me from the account, unbeknownst to me. The way I see it, I have no control over a phone that I am paying too much for and he has waived me from any responsibility by being petty and vindictive. Current phone is on AT&T .. new phone will be on my parents' plan with Sprint. 

Now obviously, I know he has access to the bill and any messages that are not sent through iMessage will pull up the number on the bill, along with any phone calls I make .. which is why I haven't used my phone to call any lawyers. He's mentioned a name of a guy I've been talking to and there is absolutely no way he would know him. Could have been from the phone bill. However, here recently, and maybe it's a manipulative tactic on his part to try to bully me into "admitting" things about my personal life to him, but he tells me that he knows I'm going out and going home with different guys, he acts as if he knows more than what he will let on, and he always messages me at the same time that I'm discussing a plan of action against him ... or chatting with a guy. My phone battery drains in a strange manner .. it's inconsistent with how fast it might drain as opposed to another time that it will be fine, despite me using it more. I have heard strange noises while on the phone. My phone has freaked out on it's own and hopped from one screen to the next, and as I'm trying to compose a message, it has selected random characters for me, sent a message of nonsense, and even sent my location through a message I had open at the time. My phone doesn't work well on WiFi and yet on a regular basis, it will just stop allowing me to use data except to send regular text messages and calls .. and even those are slow. 

I went in to AT&T and maybe the kid just wasn't very knowledgeable but he didn't provide any direction. I asked if they had any kind of monitoring software .. and I guess he didn't lie by saying "Not that I know of." however, he's clearly not informed enough to answer that, since upon doing my own research they do in fact have software to monitor your children. I then went to a Tech Distributor that also preforms IT services. I didn't really get much there either. I'm so paranoid that I can't sleep or focus. I've wondered if he's hired a hacker, knows a tech AT&T employee that somehow knows how to access information, if he downloaded software on my phone, you name it. Money is not really an issue for him, so the possibilities are frustratingly endless. I feel completely compromised and vulnerable .. and I feel like I sound like I'm crazy. If he is spying on me, I'd really like to know how and to be able to prove it, so that I have as much to fight him in court as I possibly can. What would someone do in my instance that was tech savvy or had the proper resources and people available to help them?

So .. who ever took the time to read my rambling (first, I have to say that I'm sorry .. and bless your soul ... I try to be simple, but it doesn't work out so well) and has some knowledge on the matter or even direction on who I might be able to receive actual help from, I'd really appreciate it. So sorry again for the lengthiness .. maybe I needed to vent a little too.


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## dvk01 (Dec 14, 2002)

Sorry although we deeply sympathise with you, we cannot help ort get involved in this sort of thing
You must get in touch with the authorities.
From what you are saying it is illegal harassment & spying. You need to ring your local FBI office

If you are using the same phone plan as him, then yes, he almost certainly has legal access to the phone as the bill payer & account holder.
Change your phone ASAP


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