# Why DID the chicken cross the road?



## dking63

Okay folks, put your thinking caps on and see if you can come up with some new and original answers to this age old question. But the first one to say "To get to the other side" gets flogged with a rubber chicken.

Once a week or so, we will vote for our favorites.


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## Cosmic

The chicken never really did cross the road. Only laid an egg which rolled across the road. The never ending quest of chickenhood for knowledge about the unknown and she decided to send future generations on a journey to put chicken tracks on the other side.

The real original reason for attempting the crossing was she being paid chickenfeed wages but became chickenhearted and send her daughter. So you now know the real reason, plus the egg came first. You see a chicken must cross the road somehow to make tracks on the other side, only that side has dirt. Can't make tracks on pavement or grass. Many small steps to get across the road, one Giant Leap for Chicken Kind.

The never ending quest by chickens to explore and put their chicken tracks in the mud everywhere, to say nothing of the other stuff they leave.


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## iltos

to hitch a ride to florida


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## dking63

With traffic as bad as it is these days  , it probably crossed to commit suicide.


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## Gibble

Did the chicken cross the road? Or did the road pass beneath it?


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## GoJoAGoGo

Because all the turkeys were hanging out on the other side.


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## Raziel_Storm

It depends. If the chicken was one eyed then it was to get to the Bird's Eye Shop.


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## scully40800

because he knew that the truth was out there!


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## CÃ©dric

because he fancied that chick he'd met in the village pub


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## MSM Hobbes

As Timothy Leary may have said: "Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take."


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## 700mb80min

ask him yourself !  .....


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## twotugs

http://fusionanomaly.net/whydidthechickencrosstheroad.html

I loved the I Ching's answer, but I can't seem to find the hexagram for it.


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## Sarge

cluck cluck bok bok cluck cluck bok bok cluck cluck.


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## SIR****TMG

to get to the other side


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## valley

Sarge said:


> cluck cluck bok bok cluck cluck bok bok cluck cluck.


OMG...this one takes the cake in my book


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## Raziel_Storm

Lol


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## dking63

SIR****TMG said:


> to get to the other side


Report to the chicken coop for your flogging


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## SIR****TMG

i need a what???...i'm a city folk here....don't know what he's talking about....and not sure i really want too..........


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## dking63

SIR****TMG said:


> i need a what???...i'm a city folk here....don't know what he's talking about....and not sure i really want too..........


flog ( P ) Pronunciation Key (flg, flôg)
tr.v. flogged, flog·ging, flogs

To beat severely with a whip or rod.

From dictionary.com



dking63 said:


> ...But the first one to say "To get to the other side" gets flogged with a rubber chicken...


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## SIR****TMG

i see why now...i wrote... to get to the other side........good grief....  well guess i won the million dollars here........no checks just cash please..ASAP


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## dale_2e

:down:  Who Knows :down:


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## clsxmas

In the words of Thomas de Torquemada: "Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out."


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## smeegle

You did not specify if the chicken was male or female.


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## clsxmas

smeegle said:


> You did not specify if the chicken was male or female.


It was transgendered.


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## Cosmic

To find its destiny.

Also to make the quantum leap for ChickenKind.

Also to lay down tracks while humming a Richard Marx tune, probably "Ready to Fly".

Also to check if the grass was greener on that side.

Also because the road was there.

Also because of all the other also's.

BTW your destiny is not usually on the other side. Usually you must take your other left
to go there.


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## help4me

because it was the pedestrian's day off!


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## help4me

hmmmm...... I guess it wasn't funny. Oh well!


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## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken didn't cross the road, it was too scared.


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## AdrianClarke

Its an easyyy answer!

Chickens simply Don't cross roads, they fly over it! DUH!


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## GoJoAGoGo

AdrianClarke said:


> Its an easyyy answer!
> 
> Chickens simply Don't cross roads, they fly over it! DUH!


Good answer except chickens can't fly ...


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## AdrianClarke

GoJoAGoGo said:


> Good answer except chickens can't fly ...


Well guess what, this is a special chicken, i mean, OTHER chickens don't cross the road, so this one MUST be able to fly, it all fits together now!


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## GoJoAGoGo

No way, the chicken crossed the road because the KFC Colonel was chasing it.


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## help4me

The chicken, considering itself to be of higher status than lowly amphibians, vowed not to be out done by FROGGER!


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## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken crossed the road cause the turkey was there ...


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## SIR****TMG

The chicken crossed the road cause the butcher was chasing it..................


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## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken crossed the road cause the freeway was closed ...


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## SIR****TMG

The chicken crossed the road cause she was in LOVE................


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## GoJoAGoGo

Was the chicken was jaywalking while crossing the road?


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## help4me

because it was tired of walking like an egyptian?!?


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## Cheeseball81

Mmmmm....chicken


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## help4me

Lol


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## SIR****TMG

The chicken crossed the road cause her friends were there...................


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## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken crossed the road cause it had the bird flu ...


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## SIR****TMG

The chicken crossed the road cause kfc was after her................


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## Noyb

To prove to a Possum that it could be done.


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## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken crossed the road cause the turkey was chasing it.


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## SIR****TMG

The chicken crossed the road cause to see her friends.........


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## help4me

because the chicken can't uncross the road....


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## Shamou

because that's where the male chickens were... I had to use *'male chicken' *because the real word would be bleeped out...


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## help4me

Oh My !!!!!!!


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> Oh My !!!!!!!


Have I offended thine ears??? If so, I am at your mercy thy feminine one...


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## help4me

Your words are always music to my ears.....as for mercy....remember my post?!?!


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> Your words are always music to my ears.....as for mercy....remember my post?!?!


..mother of god... I'm off to the galleys...


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## help4me

I don't think you really mind....do you?


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## SIR****TMG

we don't have MALE chickens in ohio....GOOD GRIEF.............this is a new one


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## Shamou

SIR****TMG said:


> we don't have MALE chickens in ohio....GOOD GRIEF.............this is a new one


...I always thought you guys *did* look a little feminine...


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## Shamou

...it will not tell you why... but it's worth a click...

http://www.whydidthechickencrosstheroad.com/the-chicken-dance.htm


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## help4me




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## Shamou

> What happened in 1961 that will not happen again for over 4000 years?


...my wife said: "Yes Dear."...


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## help4me

Oui Shamou!


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## SIR****TMG

The chicken crossed the road to get loved


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## help4me

SIR****TMG said:


> The chicken crossed the road to get loved


Thus the point of "male chickens"


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## SIR****TMG

no there called...ROOSTERS................


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## SIR****TMG

The chicken crossed the road to get loved by the rooster................


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## help4me

SIR****TMG said:


> no there called...ROOSTERS................


yes...roosters....I know..... But think on it a bit!


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## Shamou

SIR****TMG said:


> no there called...ROOSTERS................


Merriam-Webster Dictionary's definition of: "*C*ck*" = the adult male of the domestic chicken... now, are we going to have to draw a picture...


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## help4me

Oh Shamou...I tried to explain it sort of.....leave it to you to be blunt....ROFL


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## help4me

SIR****TMG said:


> we don't have MALE chickens in ohio....GOOD GRIEF.............this is a new one


Now....I'm just dying to know if this statemnet is still true!!!!!


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## Shamou

Why did the chicken cross the road? Now, that is a very serious question that must be approached with the outmost Cartesian rational.
Not a subject matter to be taken lightly. Lesser minds would squander their time on such trivial subjects such as: Why am I . Or, The origin of the universe. But, we, who love to navigate in the higher stratosphere of human thoughts, have but one burning desire. To find the answer to that profound question that has tormented without mercy the philosophers, astrophysicists and sages since time immemorial.

We must we must we must find an answer. That is why, I urge you, from the bottom of my being, to give generously to the TSG organization so that we may bring to fruition and to the ultimate conclusion this quest to find the answer to the question: Why, oh, why, did the chicken cross the road?!!


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## help4me

While the commitee is forming...I interject this thought: It is possible that there is a sociobiological explanation for it, but we have been deluged in recent years with sociobiological stories despite the fact that we have little direct evidence about the genetics of behaviour, and we do not know how to obtain it for the specific behaviours that figure most prominently in sociobiological speculation.


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> While the commitee is forming...I interject this thought: It is possible that there is a sociobiological explanation for it, but we have been deluged in recent years with sociobiological stories despite the fact that we have little direct evidence about the genetics of behaviour, and we do not know how to obtain it for the specific behaviours that figure most prominently in sociobiological speculation.


Duh!!!


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## SIR****TMG

Good Grief........................


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## help4me

SIR****TMG said:


> Good Grief........................


Luv you too


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## help4me

Shamou said:


> Why did the chicken cross the road? Now, that is a very serious question that must be approached with the outmost Cartesian rational.
> Not a subject matter to be taken lightly. Lesser minds would squander their time on such trivial subjects such as: Why am I . Or, The origin of the universe. But, we, who love to navigate in the higher stratosphere of human thoughts, have but one burning desire. To find the answer to that profound question that has tormented without mercy the philosophers, astrophysicists and sages since time immemorial.
> 
> We must we must we must find an answer. That is why, I urge you, from the bottom of my being, to give generously to the TSG organization so that we may bring to fruition and to the ultimate conclusion this quest to find the answer to the question: Why, oh, why, did the chicken cross the road?!!


The question is not, 'Why did the chicken cross the road?' but rather, 'Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?'


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## SIR****TMG

Why did the chicken cross the road? to find her egg.............


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## help4me

So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.


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## Shamou

...that poor chicken probably thought that Canada was just across the road...


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## help4me

Entirely too much idol time to be debating this absurd question so much! Ain't it fun?


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> Entirely too much idol time to be debating this absurd question so much! Ain't it fun?


...what in tarnation does *idol* means??? ...could it be that someone is anticipating Valentine night so much that she can't see straight no more???


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## help4me

sorry...idle....actually too much American Idol...on the brain...I told you before I do NOT like valentine's day. I want to be loved everyday NOT just ONE day!!!!


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## help4me

and it has been decided that we are not celebrating valentine's day at our house...again......so what is there to look forward to?


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## SIR****TMG

thats it canada was across the road................


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## Shamou

SIR****TMG said:


> thats it canada was across the road................


...especially Québec... land of free thinking... quite open to the weakness of the flesh... and especially... where we let the chickens do as they well please...


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## help4me

Shamou said:


> ... quite open to the weakness of the flesh...


I know where I'm goin' on my next vacation!!!!


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> I know where I'm goin' on my next vacation!!!!


...Doll... you try that... and you'll never want to go back...


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## help4me

Is that a promise? (thanks for callin' me doll....you're such a sweetie)


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## Shamou

...because her lawyer said..."We'll cross that road when we come to it..." 

...at least, that's what my lawyer said to me many times when I had my divorce over twenty years ago...  ...don't know why I was worried... my ex wanted only two things: 1) what I had then, and 2) what I was going to have in the future...


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## help4me

because the chicken had nothing better to do!


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## help4me

Why would he be on a road, I thought chickens lived in the ocean? I mean DUH!!!! Chicken of the SEA!!!!!


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## SIR****TMG

HA...Ha now thats a funny................


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## michael_jii

because the road was there. because it could.


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## jlsIII

Because it was stapled to a punk rocker.


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## SIR****TMG

To see if the grass was greener on the other side............


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## help4me

Why is that chicken even close to the road anyways? D*mn tourists!


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## Shamou

...could not help it when she heard the song, *"These Boots Were Made for Walking...*


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## help4me

Can't very well "un"cross it.


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> Can't very well "un"cross it.


...no, that would be a doublecross...


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## help4me

Shamou said:


> ...no, that would be a doublecross...


LOL I like your style


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> LOL I like your style


..it ez zee French and Latin in me my Lady... zee cannot help it Doll...


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## help4me

Oh my...what a combination!!!!! Careful cher ami...your words have the power to make me weak in the knees


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> Oh my...what a combination!!!!! Careful cher ami...your words have the power to make me weak in the knees


...promises... promises...


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## help4me

Shamou...Shamou....what ever will I do with you?


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## jlsIII

Excuse me, but the chicken is trying to cross the road and you guys are making it wet.


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## Shamou

jlsIII said:


> Excuse me, but the chicken is trying to cross the road and you guys are making it wet.


Hot and Wet,
Must see the Vet,

And get those slow down pills,
To calm those love hot chills,

Cause, it's driving me crazy,
And cannot stay that way,

Cross that road, see the Vet,
Must hurry, I'm soaking wet.


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## help4me

Shamou said:


> Hot and Wet,
> Must see the Vet,
> 
> And get those slow down pills,
> To calm those love hot chills,
> 
> Cause, it's driving me crazy,
> And cannot stay that way,
> 
> Cross that road, see the Vet,
> Must hurry, I'm soaking wet.


OMG Shamou ROFLMAO Where do you come up with this stuff!!!!


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> OMG Shamou ROFLMAO Where do you come up with this stuff!!!!


...been there... done that...


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## SIR****TMG

Nice one.................


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## jlsIII

I hit the chicken with my car. 

It was just standing there until it heard me coming. 

Now it's mashed flat!

I can't even stew it now.

I have to know why the chicken crossed the road.

Don't you care?


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## Shamou

jlsIII said:


> I hit the chicken with my car.
> 
> It was just standing there until it heard me coming.
> 
> Now it's mashed flat!
> 
> I can't even stew it now.
> 
> I have to know why the chicken crossed the road.
> 
> Don't you care?


That was a hit-and-run my friend,
You've been bad to the end.

Now, if the cops don't get you,
Guess who will be in the stew.


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## help4me

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. The before mentioned committee, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), the committee helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. The committee convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with committee consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution.


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## GentsBabe

smeegle said:


> You did not specify if the chicken was male or female.


A chicken is female... the rooster is male


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## GentsBabe

AdrianClarke said:


> Its an easyyy answer!
> 
> Chickens simply Don't cross roads, they fly over it! DUH!


Ummmm... chickens can't fly LOL


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## GentsBabe

GoJoAGoGo said:


> No way, the chicken crossed the road because the KFC Colonel was chasing it.


This is the one I was going to say...


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## Shamou

GentsBabe said:


> Ummmm... chickens can't fly LOL


...have you ever seen a chicken other than in a super market??? guess what... chickens do fly... not long distances... but they do fly... we learn every day, don't we?


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## jlsIII

There goes another one.

Why are there so many chickens crossing these roads?


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## SIR****TMG

it wanted to fly across the road...but then decited to walk....


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## Shamou

jlsIII said:


> There goes another one.
> 
> Why are there so many chickens crossing these roads?


Your glasses were blurry...
There was only one...
But you saw many...


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## Shamou

SIR****TMG said:


> it wanted to fly across the road...but then decited to walk....


I don't want to go all the way alone

Baby would you walk with me home

Baby would you take my hand

Come with me now to our special land,

Baby would you walk with me home

It's three a.m. and you're on my mind once again

I must have been dreaming

I thought I felt your heartbeat just then

Then I wondered how it would be

if I was your lady and you were my friend

I would put my heart in your hands

And it would never end

Baby would you walk me home

I don't want to go all the way alone

Baby would you walk with me home

Baby would you take my hand

Come with me now to our special land,

Baby would you walk with me home

I hold your picture next to my heart all the time

Oh yeah baby

You're my dream come true so glad you're entire

Then I wondered how it would be

if I was your lady and you were my friend

I would put my heart in your hands

And it would never end

Baby would you walk me home

I don't want to go all the way alone

Baby would you walk with me home

Baby would you take my hand

Come with me now to our special land,

Baby would you walk with me home

Every day and night I want to hold you

Understand that I am going to love you

In my own special way

Baby would you walk me home

I don't want to go all the way alone

Baby would you walk with me home

Baby would you take my hand

Come with me now to our special land,

Baby would you walk with me home


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## help4me

I love your wit Shamou. But this one is still my favorite. It still sends me into a fit of giggles. 



Shamou said:


> Hot and Wet,
> Must see the Vet,
> 
> And get those slow down pills,
> To calm those love hot chills,
> 
> Cause, it's driving me crazy,
> And cannot stay that way,
> 
> Cross that road, see the Vet,
> Must hurry, I'm soaking wet.


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## GentsBabe

Shamou said:


> ...have you ever seen a chicken other than in a super market??? guess what... chickens do fly... not long distances... but they do fly... we learn every day, don't we?


Hate to break it to ya, but I lived on a farm till I was 15 years old. One of the MANY animals we bred were chickens... we had 1000's of them. They cannot fly, they can flap their wings and move a distance, but it's not techinically flying. Just as you can jump off a picnic table, wave your arms like crazy, you'll move for a few seconds, you're still not flying either.

Ever heard the saying about *assuming*??


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## SIR****TMG

just to do it................


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## jlsIII

The chicken crossed the road to demonstrate its ability to fly, which wasn't all that good.

I wonder why it chose that particular moment.


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## Shamou

GentsBabe said:


> Hate to break it to ya, but I lived on a farm till I was 15 years old. One of the MANY animals we bred were chickens... we had 1000's of them. They cannot fly, they can flap their wings and move a distance, but it's not techinically flying. Just as you can jump off a picnic table, wave your arms like crazy, you'll move for a few seconds, you're still not flying either.
> 
> Ever heard the saying about *assuming*??


...jumping off a picnic table is one thing... leaving the ground from a standstill, going up in the air and landing five or six feet farther, when you are the size of a chicken... is called flying... by any definition...

















Thesaurus... fly
verb
To move through the air with or as if with wings:


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## SIR****TMG

to make you wonder why....


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## Shamou

She was searching for her golf ball...


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## SIR****TMG

she lost her egg


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## jlsIII

The hen crossed the rooster, then had to flee across the road.

I saw a rooster leave the ground and then flap its wings while "leaping" to the top of an eight-foot post.


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## cybertech

Shamou, Your post has been reported as offensive. Please edit it.

Thanks


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## Shamou

cybertech said:


> Shamou, Your post has been reported as offensive. Please edit it.
> 
> Thanks


Very sorry... will be more careful in the future.... post was deleted.


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## Shamou

Let us ask the chicken why it did cross the road...









answer
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
kit, kit, kidit, kitkit, kidit.... (what did you expect from a chicken???

man, what a lame joke... my only excuse, it's a slow night and I have to wait till something exciting comes up...


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## help4me

I liked the deleted one better...G*** D*** stood for Gosh Darn Right?????


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> I liked the deleted one better...G*** D*** stood for Gosh Darn Right?????


...ya... you did *G*ot *D*at...


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## help4me

I hide very well cher ami! I keep tabs on the happenings and put in my two cents worth every now and again. Be it wanted, accepted, agreed with, or not. Ain't I a *G*ood *D*oll ?!?!?


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> I hide very well cher ami! I keep tabs on the happenings and put in my two cents worth every now and again. Be it wanted, accepted, agreed with, or not. Ain't I a *G*ood *D*oll ?!?!?


*Gosh Darn* right... and if the mods get after me again for this post, I'll say, "Bonnie and the Devil made me do it!


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## help4me

Now that would be redundant as I can be both myself and the devil at the same time, for my sign is Gemini!!!!


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## Shamou

help4me said:


> Now that would be redundant as I can be both myself and the devil at the same time, for my sign is Gemini!!!!


well maybe you could use this as your next avatar...


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## help4me

What Gilligan (from Gilligan's island) would say : The traffic started getting rough; the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail - the chicken would be lost. The chicken would be lost!


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## MorrisAO

The chicken crossed the road to answer the age old question. Did it come first or was it the egg?

[yeah, I know, lame, but it was all I could come up with on the spur of the moment]


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## ~Candy~

Shamou said:


> *Gosh Darn* right... and if the mods get after me again for this post, I'll say, "Bonnie and the Devil made me do it!


For the record, the mods don't have time to scour around for offensive posts, usually someone reports it, we and/or they look at it, and if we or they feel it's justified, either delete it or ask for an edit  A new member gets a quick deletion, members in good standing are afforded nicer tactics.........sometimes......

So......hope that sets the record straight.


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## clsxmas

The chicken crossed the road because it now felt safer.


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## Shamou

AcaCandy said:


> For the record, the mods don't have time to scour around for offensive posts, usually someone reports it, we and/or they look at it, and if we or they feel it's justified, either delete it or ask for an edit  A new member gets a quick deletion, members in good standing are afforded nicer tactics.........sometimes......
> 
> So......hope that sets the record straight.


I never thought that the letters "G&D" could be offensive to anyone... but, if it is, I will no longer use them... I wanna be a good boy... and follow the rules... TSG comes just after girls and before hockey in my book... so I don't want to be kicked out...


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## ~Candy~

You never know what sets folks off sometimes, I've seen a LOT WORSE and no one reports it, so go figure 

You guys do know that we can still see it when you delete your posts, right?


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## Shamou

> originally posted by *AcaCandy*
> You guys do know that we can still see it when you delete your posts, right?


O M G ... just hope that you cannot see what goes on in my mind at times... someone would blush... and someone would get a big "SMACK"...


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## cybertech

Thanks Shamou! You made my life easy by doing it yourself! :up:


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## Shamou

cybertech said:


> Thanks Shamou! You made my life easy by doing it yourself! :up:


What would I not do for you...


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## Shamou

The following was posted by *MorrisAO* in *Joke/Humor Time...*

Why did the chicken cross the road?

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN: What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?

IMMANUEL KANT: The chicken was acting out of a sense of duty to cross the road, as chickens have traditionally crossed roads throughout history.

COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?

RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road. I don't know any chickens. I have never known any chickens.


----------



## cybertech

Shamou said:


> What would I not do for you...


----------



## clsxmas

The chicken crossed the road to get out of the way of the Veep's quail hunt.


----------



## Shamou

*She was making a delivery...*


----------



## TigersRock

To get to the chick on the other side


----------



## SIR****TMG

to pick up her feathers


----------



## Shamou

I asked her psychiatrist and he said that it was due to an oedipus complex brought upon by a malignant state of priapism resulting from a bad case of claustrophobically induced state of paranoia. In other words... because she's nuts and so is the guy who wrote this...


----------



## help4me

Shamou said:


> I asked her psychiatrist and he said that it was due to an oedipus complex brought upon by a malignant state of priapism resulting from a bad case of claustrophobically induced state of paranoia. In other words... because she's nuts and so is the guy who wrote this...


OMG.....ROFL  Once again caught me by surprise...I like this one!


----------



## Shamou

I asked Mulder why the chicken walked across the road and he said... I would like to know too, because every time I get close to a chick, she *runs* across the road...


----------



## SIR****TMG

to see Shamou why else............


----------



## Shamou

SIR****TMG said:


> to see Shamou why else............


Who told you that all the chicks were after me???


----------



## SIR****TMG

Yep they are..............


----------



## SIR****TMG

they were looking for the greener grass on the other side


----------



## KMW

the bird was trying to get away from all the" why did the chicken cross the road jokes"


----------



## BanditFlyer

Hope no-one's posted this one yet:

"I want to live in a better tomorrow, a place where a chicken can cross the road and not have his motives questioned (unknown)" 

Sounds like George Carlin to me


----------



## Shamou

I asked the chicken and she replied, "When you gotta go... you gotta go..."


----------



## SIR****TMG

to run from the ...Rooster..........


----------



## Shamou

Howard Cosell on, Why DID the chicken cross the road? 

"It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an Herculean achievement formerly relegated to ****- sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurrence."


----------



## SIR****TMG

to see the other side...............


----------



## Shamou

"I don't know why, but methinks I could rattle off a hundred-line soliloquy without much ado."
William Shakespeare


----------



## SIR****TMG

not even the chicken knows why


----------



## BanditFlyer

This chicken's startin' to tick me off. Why won't he just leave me alone? One more road crossing and I'm havin' a barbeque :angry:


----------



## Shamou

BanditFlyer said:


> This chicken's startin' to tick me off. Why won't he just leave me alone? One more road crossing and I'm havin' a barbeque :angry:


...it is called 'lateral thinking.' When you mind has reached a zenith you must navigate laterally to a point where a non suspected vista will open... and then you are ready to climb again. The problem with most people (as in CD) is that they try to tackle the *big* issues. It is like pushing against the wind... you get nowhere. However, when you sow a single little acorn... a mighty oak tree will grow... Thus, 'Why, ho why, did the chicken cross the friggin road...???'


----------



## help4me

What else is a chicken going to do with a road but cross it?


----------



## marium

because the chicken finally saw the restroom on the other side of the road


----------



## BanditFlyer

Shamou said:


> ...it is called 'lateral thinking.' When you mind has reached a zenith you must navigate laterally to a point where a non suspected vista will open... and then you are ready to climb again. The problem with most people (as in CD) is that they try to tackle the *big* issues. It is like pushing against the wind... you get nowhere. However, when you sow a single little acorn... a mighty oak tree will grow... Thus, 'Why, ho why, did the chicken cross the friggin road...???'


Cool Thanks!!

I just googled it. I'm going to have to remind myself to look into it later.


----------



## Shamou

BanditFlyer said:


> Cool Thanks!!
> 
> I just googled it. I'm going to have to remind myself to look into it later.


...to get insight into this, you will have to read, 'Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance' by Robert M Pirsig... It was a cult book in the sixties...


----------



## BanditFlyer

Shamou said:


> ... read, 'Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance' by Robert M Pirsig...


Thanks! My reading list grows daily!


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken crossed the road because the turkey with bird flu was chasing it ...


----------



## Shamou

Because she heard a bunch of girls talking and she thought they were chicken squawking...


----------



## marium

or may be because teh chicken saw a real cute chick on the other side


----------



## Shamou

Now, you're getting naughty... this is homosexuality... I have nothing against that, wish all the guys were like that... then I would be God's gift to women... you see...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Cause there was a KFC on that side of the road ...


----------



## help4me

Because 'tis better to suffer in the mind the slings and arrows of outrageous road maintenance than to take arms against a sea of on coming vehicles...


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> Because 'tis better to suffer in the mind the slings and arrows of outrageous road maintenance than to take arms against a sea of on coming vehicles...


...well...duh!!!


----------



## help4me




----------



## SIR****TMG

I like that..............


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


>


...you take the words: *geese *and *goosed*... and you'll know what just happened...


----------



## SIR****TMG

to find time


----------



## Shamou

SIR****TMG said:


> to find time


...SirT, I think you've been smoking some bad stuff... better stick to beer and booze...


----------



## SIR****TMG

Ha..ha...still hasn't found it yet


----------



## help4me

hmmmm....can't find the time you say?


----------



## marium

Shamou said:


> Now, you're getting naughty... this is homosexuality... I have nothing against that, wish all the guys were like that... then I would be God's gift to women... you see...


 uh oh 
i thought it was the male chhicken who crossed the road !!
nevermind
if its a female chicken who crossed it, then may be she saw a jewellery shop


----------



## help4me

LOL marium....there was a discussion about male chickens a few pages ago


----------



## marium

i am completely embarrassed
*hidden my face with bonnie's skirt* 
how are you doing sweetheart ?


----------



## marium

Shamou said:


> Now, you're getting naughty... this is homosexuality... I have nothing against that, wish all the guys were like that... then I would be God's gift to women... you see...


awww only if wishes were horses Shamou sweety...  
you got all my sympathies


----------



## Shamou

marium said:


> awww only if wishes were horses Shamou sweety...
> you got all my sympathies


...sympathies... that's a start... all I have to do is work my way up from there...


----------



## marium

Shamou said:


> ...sympathies... that's a start... all I have to do is work my way up from there...


aww
i guess it will take your life time to make up ur way from there


----------



## Shamou

marium said:


> aww
> i guess it will take your life time to make up ur way from there


...no hurry, my lovely... it's the chase, not the catch that counts...


----------



## marium

Shamou said:


> ...no hurry, my lovely... it's the chase, not the catch that counts...


so you aint going to give up  
wait till my guy reads this, i am all scared


----------



## Shamou

marium said:


> so you aint going to give up
> wait till my guy reads this, i am all scared


...me thinks that this Dude of yours could stand a little jealousy... so tell him about Ol' Shamou... aka... Black Jack Shallack... ze french lovair... and his... growing passion for ze marium...


----------



## marium

Shamou said:


> ...me thinks that this Dude of yours could stand a little jealousy... so tell him about Ol' Shamou... aka... Black Jack Shallack... ze french lovair... and his... growing passion for ze marium...


i am really sorry to inform you he really can't 
and ze marium is all flattered


----------



## Shamou

marium said:


> i am really sorry to inform you he really can't
> and ze marium is all flattered


... glad marium is all flattered ... cause when I told that to zee chicken... zee chicken walked across zee road...


----------



## help4me




----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


>


Does zat means zat Black Jack Shallack schtinks???


----------



## help4me

Not at all...don't you know Pepe Le Pu is adorable


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> Not at all...don't you know Pepe Le Pu is adorable


...maybe adorable... but zee hees a garçon... zee hees zee competition...


----------



## SIR****TMG

not real sure why..........to make us ask questions?


----------



## Shamou

SIR****TMG said:


> not real sure why..........to make us ask questions?


Ha...ha


----------



## help4me

Shamou said:


> ...maybe adorable... but zee hees a garçon... zee hees zee competition...


A little competiton never hurt anyone


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> A little competiton never hurt anyone


...that's what I told my first wife... but she still wanted a divorce...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

chicken crossed the road cause he wanted to ...


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> chicken crossed the road cause he wanted to ...


wanted to what???


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> wanted to what???


cross the road silly ...


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> cross the road silly ...


...are you coming on to me???


----------



## SIR****TMG

HA...ha...........................


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> ...are you coming on to me???


Oh no, don't be silly ...


----------



## Shamou

*Calling me Silly... GGGGGGGGrrrrrrrrrrr*


----------



## marium

Shamou said:


> *Calling me Silly... GGGGGGGGrrrrrrrrrrr*


what is that?


----------



## Shamou

marium said:


> what is that?


...that is my alter ego... or the awesome brain in my head as you can see me in this trance... where I devour tenty year old nosy girls...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> ...that is my alter ego... or the awesome brain in my head as you can see me in this trance... where I devour tenty year old nosy girls...


Now, that really is a silly picture ...


----------



## help4me

Y'all are nuts  You've lost your minds contemplating why the chicken crossed the road!


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> Y'all are nuts  You've lost your minds contemplating why the chicken crossed the road!


We do not suffer from insanity... we enjoy every minute of it...


----------



## help4me

I must say...I'm enjoying your insanity as well.


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

help4me said:


> Y'all are nuts  You've lost your minds contemplating why the chicken crossed the road!


That's the way the chicken wanted it to be ...


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> That's the way the chicken wanted it to be ...


...you have funny chickens in Anaheim...


----------



## help4me

I laugh every time I see that


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> ...you have funny chickens in Anaheim...


That reminds me, why did the penguin cross the frozen lake?


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> That reminds me, why did the penguin cross the frozen lake?


...you and I know why the penguin crossed the lake... but, could you be a little young to discuss those things... read some place that you were sixteen???


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> ...you and I know why the penguin crossed the lake... but, could you be a little young to discuss those things... read some place that you were sixteen???


Can't always believe what you read. Oh me, oh my, what I would do to be sweet sixteen. I would cross the road, then head towards the frozen lake, check out my penguin friends and then, well I'll leave that part open ...


----------



## SIR****TMG

HA......ha.............


----------



## help4me

well said SirT


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> well said SirT


Middle finger....'*Thenshun *and* Salute*!!!'


----------



## help4me

getting rough again  bring it on


----------



## Shamou

*OK...*


----------



## help4me

You can do better than that


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> You can do better than that


...that's what my wife said last night too...   ...and I did...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Lets get back to the subject of this thread ... 

Q: Why did the chicken run across the road?
A: There was a car coming.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
A: She wanted to lay it on the line.
Q: Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?
A: She wanted to stretch her legs.
Q: Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?
A: She was afraid someone would caesar!
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To prove to the possum it could actually be done!


----------



## Shamou

She was doing her cardio...


----------



## Shamou

I am very saddened to see that in more than 24 hours, there has been no contribution to this most psychological and philosophical oriented quest. Where have all the great minds of TSG gone too? I am just glad that Albert Einstein is not alive today to see such mental decay...  Could it be the last ravage of the Chicken Flu??? Or, am I the only nut in town...???


----------



## help4me

No Shamou...your village called...their idiot is missing


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> No Shamou...your village called...their idiot is missing


...well, it is *you* they called....


----------



## help4me

LOL...another good one :up: You have a good sense of humor


----------



## help4me

The chicken did not really cross the road because one side and the other are not really opposites in the first place.


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> The chicken did not really cross the road because one side and the other are not really opposites in the first place.


...I hate Yoga... makes people say the strangest things...


----------



## help4me

Many are few 
in all of some,
but a little is a lot
in most of none.
All is some of it,
while many is none of it, 
but a little is a lot 
in most of it!
Another is all in few of some,
and others are a lot 
in most of none.


----------



## Shamou

I am confused,
I am amused.

Don't know whats it's all about,
Will take a few minutes to find out.

Might even put it to music,
Would make lovely lyric.

If only I had some talent,
But alas, my brain is latent.

Stuff comes out of it,
But none is music.


----------



## help4me

If I can't dazzle you with my brilliance, I'll baffle you with my bull****!


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> If I can't dazzle you with my brilliance, I'll baffle you with my bull****!


...I'm a sucker for bulldogs... everyone knows that...


----------



## help4me

LOL  I love your wit......wait.....YOU corrected that....."I love you TWIT"


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken was chicken to cross the road ...


----------



## SIR****TMG

i like that answer


----------



## Shamou

You would...


----------



## help4me

Ha Ha


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

SIR****TMG said:


> i like that answer


Thanks for your support ... :up:


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> Thanks for your support ... :up:


Better known as an athletic support...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> Better known as an athletic support...


In need of a good jock itch medicine ...


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> Ha Ha


William could not have said it better, "A nut is a nut is a nut.... what by any other name could be so silly or be nuttier... "  or was it... "A rose...


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> In need of a good jock itch medicine ...


Congratulation... that *is* creative... you're getting there Buddy...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> Congratulation... that *is* creative... you're getting there Buddy...


Getting there huh, I've been there and done that but I still really don't know why that darn chicken crossed the road ...


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> Getting there huh, I've been there and done that but I still really don't know why that darn chicken crossed the road ...


She's on her way to see Awnold... in Kawleefooniaw...


----------



## SIR****TMG

green acre's is the place to be


----------



## help4me

farm living is the life for me


----------



## mister_b1LL

he wanted to join the bunny in suicide

http://www.bookofbunnysuicides.com/


----------



## Shamou

Mister Bill, you're a funny guy,
But that ol' chicken don't want to die.

That ol' chicken is looking for adventure,
Lost of fun and much pleasure.

So if bad thoughts like suicide is on your mind,
In this thread we don't want that kind.

So, go play in forums on CD.
That's the place for you to be.


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

I heard too many reasons but only the chicken really knows why ...


----------



## SIR****TMG

to see the rooster


----------



## Shamou

Rene Descartes: 'I think therefore I am' has been seen and heard around the world but is no more profound than, 'Why did the chicken cross the road?' The subject matter at hand is not relevant, it's what we make of it that is. That is Zen in it's purest form... That is where you _may_ find the Buddha... (I said the Buddha... not Dubwa...)...they are easy to tell apart... one is fat and lazy... the other is thin and crazy...


----------



## Shamou

Da poor chicken was just confused...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> Da poor chicken was just confused...


The chicken wasn't confused, there's more to that,
I heard the poor chicken was chasing the cat.

The cat you see ate the chicken's egg,
This made the chicken so mad she grew a third leg.

With three legs now this chicken was very fast,
She crossed the road and caught the cat at last.


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> The chicken wasn't confused, there's more to that,
> I heard the poor chicken was chasing the cat.
> 
> The cat you see ate the chicken's egg,
> This made the chicken so mad she grew a third leg.
> 
> With three legs now this chicken was very fast,
> She crossed the road and caught the cat at last.


She caught the cat... but that was a ruse,
Hear what happens and you won't be amused.

The catcher became the catchee,
And the cat just ate that little chicky.

See how he enjoys a good diner,
Or was it for his supper?


----------



## SIR****TMG

I wish we knew............


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

We'll soon know the whole truth ...


----------



## help4me

We will?


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Time will tell ...


----------



## help4me

No...William Tell


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Tell all book soon to be released ...


----------



## help4me

Oh my...Now what a book that would be....and a talk show too!


----------



## Shamou

The next Pope might be named: Whydidthechickencrosstheroad...


----------



## SIR****TMG

HA ha....funny


----------



## help4me

Could be..... you never know


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> The next Pope might be named: Whydidthechickencrosstheroad...


Nope, that's not very funny ...


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> Nope, that's not very funny ...


O K...


----------



## SIR****TMG

were not telling why


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

why not share your thoughts :up:


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> why not share your thoughts :up:


SirT is a man of few words. Mostly 'Ha...ha...' or 'Nice joke.'
I have never heard or read anything else from that Bloke.

I am certain he's a nice man,
But says as little as he can.

So, if you want him to share his thoughts with you,
You'll simply have to call him I.O.U.

That will cost you some money,
But won't come from that twenty...

Sorry, that's from the wrong thread...
Too late now... must go ahead...


----------



## SIR****TMG

HA...ha .....funny...but nice


----------



## help4me

Shamou...I love your prose :up: Seriously....you should publish


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> Shamou...I love your prose :up: Seriously....you should publish


I did... it's an Autobiography... here's the cover....


----------



## help4me

LOL  Related to Tarzan


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> LOL  Related to Tarzan


Where do you think Tarzan got his stuff from???


----------



## help4me

Shamou said:


> Where do you think Tarzan got his stuff from???


Jane of course!!!!!!


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> Jane of course!!!!!!


You mean intercourse???


----------



## help4me

OOOOOOhhhhhh! Shamouuuuuu!!!! I can't believe you just typed that!!!


----------



## help4me




----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> You mean intercourse???


Shouldn't that be a <CWLMST> type thingy?


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> Shouldn't that be a type thingy?


Shucks... I thought that all the babies were having a nap at this time of day... Forgot that in Kawleefooneaw you'se guys were three hours late...







   ...just kidding...


----------



## help4me

Where were we....oh yes....the chicken....the road.....WHY?????


----------



## Shamou

The chicken crossed the road to set a precedent like in jaywalking. A jay walked and then we had 'jaywalking.' A chicken crossed... so now we should have "chickencrossing." And for those who are not familiar with the definition of chickencrossing... it simply means a guy who does not keep his word toward his girlfriend...

PS.- That joke may not seem very funny to you now... but, at 4.00 am after 12 beers, it's hilarious...


----------



## help4me

The duck suggested to the chicken that they play
follow the leader then the duck crossed the road causing the chicken to cross after it, but at the same time holding up traffic, thus proving that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction .


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken saw Shamou standing across the road. GoJo arrived in his power driven skateboard to pickup help4me who was standing on the opposite side of the road. GoJo and help4me rode their power driven skateboard to the adjacent road. Then there a load sound of a police siren in the distance. SIR****TMG then arrived on his roller skates which scared the chicken who then darted across the road to escape the mad roller skater. Shamou then proceeded to chase SIR****TMG down the road which allowed the chicken to cross to the other side of the road where GoJo and help4me were waiting to rescue the chicken from this ongoing TSG thread.


----------



## Shamou

That Ol' Chicken practiced levitation for a fraction of a second while the earth rotated at 25,000 miles an hour under his feet. Thus, when he landed... he was clear across the road.


----------



## help4me

GoJoAGoGo said:


> The chicken saw Shamou standing across the road. GoJo arrived in his power driven skateboard to pickup help4me who was standing on the opposite side of the road. GoJo and help4me rode their power driven skateboard to the adjacent road. Then there a load sound of a police siren in the distance. SIR****TMG then arrived on his roller skates which scared the chicken who then darted across the road to escape the mad roller skater. Shamou then proceeded to chase SIR****TMG down the road which allowed the chicken to cross to the other side of the road where GoJo and help4me were waiting to rescue the chicken from this ongoing TSG thread.


ROFLMAO I love it  You are truly gifted with wit.....LOL...This is too funny....HA!!!


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> The chicken saw Shamou standing across the road. GoJo arrived in his power driven skateboard to pickup help4me who was standing on the opposite side of the road. GoJo and help4me rode their power driven skateboard to the adjacent road. Then there a load sound of a police siren in the distance. SIR****TMG then arrived on his roller skates which scared the chicken who then darted across the road to escape the mad roller skater. Shamou then proceeded to chase SIR****TMG down the road which allowed the chicken to cross to the other side of the road where GoJo and help4me were waiting to rescue the chicken from this ongoing TSG thread.


...next to be seen in a full length film starring Gojo, SirT, help4me and directed by the maestro... Shamou...


----------



## help4me

LOL...Shamou...you do think of ways to fill your spare time


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> LOL...Shamou...you do think of ways to fill your spare time


...it's therapy my Dear... 3000mg of laughter and wit every day will keep the boys with the straightjacket away...


----------



## help4me

boys with straight jackets can be fun...... Not that I would know or anything


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

This could be a whole new thread called, "How Did Shamou Escape From The Straightjacket".


----------



## help4me

LOL...now THAT would be entertainment


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> LOL...now THAT would be entertainment


...for a slick Dude like me... a piece of cake...


----------



## help4me

But the ways in which to bound you, would literally astound you! And much more enjoyable than the perplexing question of a chicken's traveling habits!


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> But the ways in which to bound you, would literally astound you! And much more enjoyable than the perplexing question of a chicken's traveling habits!


May I respectfully remind you that this is a family forum.... a little decorum please...


----------



## help4me

And who was it that typed this ?!?!?!?! 



Shamou said:


> You mean intercourse???


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> And who was it that typed this ?!?!?!?!


Some type... some do.... I only typed...


----------



## help4me

Lol


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> Lol


Smile if you did...


----------



## help4me

hmph!...


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> hmph!...


Bwahahahaha... I could see you.... you were smiling...


----------



## help4me

Lol....


----------



## Shamou

Because she wanted to know where the music came from...








...poochee had left a window open...


----------



## Shamou

I finally figured out why the chicken crossed the road... but I'll be XXXX if I'll tell you...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> I finally figured out why the chicken crossed the road... but I'll be XXXX if I'll tell you...


Then you should try and post it in the <CWLMST> thread ...


----------



## help4me

You mean this is over yet?!?!?!?!?  

I still think the chicken crossed the road because it was the pedestrian's day off!


----------



## Shamou

GoJoAGoGo said:


> Then you should try and post it in the <CWLMST> thread ...


Can't do that... 







are not allowed... so you could not be there so it would be no fun...


----------



## BanditFlyer

Shamou said:


> I finally figured out why the chicken crossed the road... but I'll be XXXX if I'll tell you...


Right on bro! Stick it to em. Don't let da man, or in this case the chicken, getcha.

You should write a book, an exposé. Charge $1million USD for each copy.

Power to the Poultry!


----------



## Shamou

BanditFlyer said:


> Right on bro! Stick it to em. Don't let da man, or in this case the chicken, getcha.
> 
> You should write a book, an exposé. Charge $1million USD for each copy.
> 
> Power to the Poultry!


You wanna be my agent???


----------



## BanditFlyer

Shamou said:


> You wanna be my agent???


Abso-floggin-lutely!

Now I gotta start workin on my Don King accent.

Our book is gonna be magnanimocious! It's gonna be splendiferentocious!

Halleluyah and a half! Only in America could that _foul_ swine of Poultry finally get his just desserts.

This great man, Shamou, has written a book that will shatter your nerves to the very core of your nerves! He's gonna make you wish you were illiterate! He's gonna send you screamin back to your mama!

All right, looks like we're making some headway on the accent, now to start on the haircut.


----------



## help4me

and the plot thickens with chickens


----------



## Shamou

BanditFlyer said:


> Abso-floggin-lutely!
> 
> Now I gotta start workin on my Don King accent.
> 
> Our book is gonna be magnanimocious! It's gonna be splendiferentocious!
> 
> Halleluyah and a half! Only in America could that _foul_ swine of Poultry finally get his just desserts.
> 
> This great man, Shamou, has written a book that will shatter your nerves to the very core of your nerves! He's gonna make you wish you were illiterate! He's gonna send you screamin back to your mama!
> 
> All right, looks like we're making some headway on the accent, now to start on the haircut.


Great prestations...


----------



## BanditFlyer

Hah!

Thanks Shamou! :up:


----------



## Shamou

I do believe that the question "Why DID the chicken cross the road?" is a koan. It invites to parallel thinking which could open new vistas and result in a personal breakthrough. 
It is also a vacation for the mind and a great distraction from life's petty annoyances. 

Care to comment on these observations???


----------



## help4me

Shamou said:


> Care to comment on these observations???


Yes....what have you been drinking??


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> Yes....what have you been drinking??


Same stuff that the lady who posted the new thread, "Shamou...Distinguished Memeber" did... That was extremely nice of her... and I do thank her very much... but I wish that she had posted Member instead of Memeber...


----------



## help4me

I'm so sorry  ......I make that mistake a lot. I'll see if I can get it changed


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> I'm so sorry  ......I make that mistake a lot. I'll see if I can get it changed


Don't be sorry... just get your butt out there and change it...   

I kid you... cause I like you... good night... going to see Jay Leno...


----------



## help4me

I will and I know cher ami...good night


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> I will and I know cher ami...good night


I did and you know chère amie... good morning...


----------



## help4me

Shamou said:


> I did and you know chère amie... good morning...




mornin  everything is fixed..............

now about those chickens??????


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Oh yes, why did that chicken cross the road?
Was it because the chicken saw a toad?
Or was it because the chicken was very old?
The answer will be upcoming I am told.


----------



## Shamou

Mike must be very proud of us. He wanted to build a site for teckies and ended up with a nut farm... and that is why the chicken crossed the road... she had laid too many eggs already... and did not want to be blamed for this fiasco...


----------



## Shamou

This used to be my favorite thread,
Now, it's almost dead.

Nobody wants to know,
Why the chick wanted to go.

It's a sad day in human affair,
That this blew up in the air.

But, as long as there is life there is hope,
That we'll find out why the chicken eloped.


----------



## help4me

In poetry mode
to cross that road
to discover the reason
for poultry treason.
The other chickens
are little dickens
and in a snit
because of it.
Said the chicken,
her beak a clickin'
"This road I'll cross,
I am my own boss!"
Quite unlike chicken decorum
So now we debate at TSG forum


----------



## holy_saiyan1

A: Because it was there.

How do we know that it was in fact the chicken moving and the road being stationary? The chicken could have been stationary and the road moving, and the effects of acceleration that the chicken would feel and that we would observe would be the same as if the chicken was actually moving.


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

holy_saiyan1 said:


> A: Because it was there.
> 
> How do we know that it was in fact the chicken moving and the road being stationary? The chicken could have been stationary and the road moving, and the effects of acceleration that the chicken would feel and that we would observe would be the same as if the chicken was actually moving.


Good answer, this could be like there was a sudden earthquake causing the road to move or something similiar ...


----------



## Shamou

Now we know why the chicken crossed the road...


----------



## help4me

They caught that chickens cousin......


----------



## Mikoll




----------



## help4me

That's great Mikoll :up:, and welcome to TSG


----------



## Shamou

Welcome to TSG Mikoll ...your entry in this thread is probably the best one yet... :up: hope you enjoy TSG and that we get to see you a lot...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Has this question been resolved? If so, what's the correct answer? 

My answer is that there is no correct answer ...


----------



## Shamou

Slip and slide... slip and slide,
That Old chicken wanted to glide.

Slip and slide, slip and slide,
She fell flat on her back side.

Slip and slide, slip and slide,
Ended up on the other side...

Slip and slide, slip and slide,
She had nothing to hide.

Slip and slide, slip and slide,
Just took a heck of a ride.


----------



## help4me

LMAO  Excellent Shamou ! :up:


----------



## SIR****TMG

HA...ha ...great


----------



## help4me

What ever became of that chicken?


----------



## Shamou

help4me said:


> What ever became of that chicken?


... there you go...


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Shamou said:


> ... there you go...











*Finger Licken Good*


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken broke his wings and had to cross the road to receive first aid at the local Red Cross station......


----------



## JEBWrench

There was a sale, and who can resist 50% off??


----------



## Shamou

JEBWrench said:


> There was a sale, and who can resist 50% off??


50% off... if you're talking about a bikini... I'd cross that road too...


----------



## help4me

It's been resurrected.....cool


----------



## JEBWrench

The power of 50% off bikinis never fails to resurrect.


----------



## Shamou

JEBWrench said:


> The power of 50% off bikinis never fails to resurrect.


Yup... you got that one right...


----------



## help4me

You two are such GUYS


----------



## JEBWrench

Not just guys, Canadian guys.


----------



## help4me

naw...it's an international guy thing...not just Canadian dudes


----------



## Guest

chicken crossed the road because there was no cars passing by.......


----------



## JEBWrench

Maybe, but we're best at it.


----------



## JEBWrench

Chicken crossed the road because he spent too much time listening to Dashboard Confessional and wanted to experience the glorious pain of life so as to express his individuality just like everyone else?


----------



## help4me

best maybe at being "guys" but not the BEST guy


----------



## JEBWrench

Maybe so, but I'll gladly audition for the part.


----------



## help4me

Sorry....adutions are closed for the BEST guy. I think I already know to whom that role is going.

As for anything else....auditions are not necessary for good friends


----------



## JEBWrench

I'll settle for that, and wait until I can find some open auditions elsewhere.


----------



## help4me

Cool beans dude :up:


----------



## JEBWrench

The chicken crossed the road to watch the Twister game.


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken crossed the road so an endless, meanless ongoing thread could be started at TSG and be read by all the chickens in the world who don't give a pluck ...


----------



## JEBWrench

Two words: Military Diversion.


----------



## Guest

one word.....


hi ya elephant... 


curses......that's three words.....


----------



## ramrohan

chicken crossed the road to post a reply on TSG


----------



## help4me

ODIN 0ERO said:


> one word.....
> 
> hi ya elephant...
> 
> curses......that's three words.....


Hi ya yourself


----------



## Guest

> Hi ya yourself


bonjour mon chéri!...


----------



## help4me

bonjour


----------



## Guest

i said it first.....  



hehehe....color changing elephant.....i like that...


----------



## help4me

The chicken crossed the road to tell us to quit hijacking this thread.....so out of political correctness...and sensitivity to the culture of the chicken...let's fly on outta here


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

The chicken was too chicken to cross the road ...


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road to visit the grocers and buy eggs


----------



## JEBWrench

To a chicken, that's adoption!

The chicken crossed the road to duck the cops and chase the one-winged rooster.


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road to get some stuffing!


----------



## JEBWrench

The chicken crossed the road to start a picket line against the farmer!


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road to visit KFC as a dare!


----------



## JEBWrench

The chicken subsequently re-crossed the road in quiet contemplation of the horrors he saw...


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road quickly when hearing someone mentioned dinner


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Because a big turkey was chasing him.


----------



## JEBWrench

Because he was afraid of getting grounded.


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Because the KFC colonel was looking for game.


----------



## dotty999

the poor chicken crossed the road to find its nest egg


----------



## SIR****TMG

to find the.... ROOSTER


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Because the chicken wanted to.


----------



## SIR****TMG

to find love


----------



## dotty999

he fancied a human curry


----------



## SIR****TMG

grass was greener on other side


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Because the "Walk Sign" said to walk.


----------



## dotty999

it was looking for the roadside chick


----------



## SIR****TMG

the chicken was reading the...MAP....


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road with a view to getting stuffed


----------



## SIR****TMG

i agree with that...stuffed


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road to enter the chicken shack


----------



## SIR****TMG

to get a drink


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road to find its giblets


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

Because the chicken wanted to meet the turkey standing on the corner.


----------



## SIR****TMG

I'm not sure any more why they cross the road..............


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road to meet its mate at KFC


----------



## SIR****TMG

they both wanted fried


----------



## dotty999

because it had that choice


----------



## lexmarks567

To get tickets to the Kid rock concert


----------



## dotty999

To meet his date


----------



## lexmarks567

To get to the used car lot


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road to get laid


----------



## lexmarks567

Only to be turned down


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road to exercise his rights to do so


----------



## lexmarks567

to be rejected again


----------



## dotty999

to escape the advances of lex


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

To meet a turkey who was hanging out at KFC.


----------



## lexmarks567

To escape from jail and met up with his getaway driver


----------



## dotty999

to find a policeman as he had lost his way


----------



## lexmarks567

To rob a doughnut shop to bribe the cop


----------



## SIR****TMG

grass was greener on other side


----------



## lexmarks567

His dealer was on the other side


----------



## SIR****TMG

the rooster was over there


----------



## lexmarks567

to get birth controll pills


----------



## SIR****TMG

KFC was chaseing her


----------



## CGS84

because chikon was there


----------



## SIR****TMG

lost her heart over there


----------



## lexmarks567

Someone lost $100,000,000 and she went to clam it and spend it


----------



## SIR****TMG

If someone lost that much money ,I'd beat the chicken up and take the cash. And deliver the chicken to KFC............


----------



## lexmarks567

Not if he hired bodyguards before you had a chance to


----------



## SIR****TMG

chickens are ...she.... not he....


----------



## dking63

OMG!!! Is this thing _still_ going???


----------



## SIR****TMG

yes it is and not going to die...we all like it


----------



## dking63

I think I'm on to the true answer. I just got a tip from a mysterious source. I'm off to look into it now. I'll try to keep you posted.


----------



## SIR****TMG

we can't wait


----------



## lexmarks567

To get a sex change from she to he


----------



## dotty999

to collect his pension


----------



## lexmarks567

For being out of work do to getting his legs run over buy a passing car.Its the freeway after all.


----------



## SIR****TMG

was lost


----------



## Pistoff

She saw a handsome rooster? His tail feathers all moused and a BIG BEAK?


----------



## lexmarks567

to go to work


----------



## SIR****TMG

to ran away


----------



## lexmarks567

To get married


----------



## SIR****TMG

to escape prison


----------



## lexmarks567

TO flee from the cops


----------



## dking63

I'm definately on a hot lead here. I've almost found the secret of why the chicken crossed the road.


----------



## thecoalman

The chicken did not cross the road...* IT' A CONSPIRACY!!!!*

(if some else said that...oh well.., i'm not looking through 30 pages)


----------



## SIR****TMG

I almost think that...too


----------



## dotty999

is there a chicken strike going on ?


----------



## lexmarks567

to burn down KFC


----------



## dotty999

the chicken crossed the road for a dare, someone pulled its leg


----------



## lexmarks567

To get its leg back


----------



## dking63

I've found it!!! I've found out wht the chicken really crossed the road!!!!!!! It was to... ARRRRRRRRGgh......

Attention!! This is the

This human was terminated because he knew too much! Beware delving into our secrets or you will be next! BUK BUK BAWWWWK!!!


----------



## SIR****TMG

to read this sign above


----------



## lexmarks567

To hunt them down


----------



## SIR****TMG

to run away


----------



## lexmarks567

To ecape the madness of us


----------



## SIR****TMG

for the money


----------



## dotty999

cos he was l eggless


----------



## SIR****TMG

to find the correct path


----------



## dotty999

to find its mom


----------



## lexmarks567

To go see a movie


----------



## dotty999

to buy eggs


----------



## lexmarks567

To deliver easter eggs The easter bunny took the day off


----------



## dking63

Why would a chicken buy eggs? She can lay her own.


----------



## dotty999

dking63 said:


> Why would a chicken buy eggs? She can lay her own.


she was infertile


----------



## SIR****TMG

Roosters don't lay eggs...chickens do...........if she was infertile then Campbell's soup had her.Thats were they end up in soup............


----------



## dotty999

to commit suicide


----------



## lexmarks567

to vist her brother at KFC


----------



## dking63

dotty999 said:


> she was infertile.


Ummm, you never lived on a farm, did you? Most eggs laid are infertile.


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

I use to know but have forgot the reason why ...


----------



## lexmarks567

To become a member of TSG


----------



## tedwinder

Why shouldn't it?


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

To gather the eggs some turkey left.


----------



## SIR****TMG

was lost


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

To meet a friend


----------



## SIR****TMG

to get away from you.....


----------



## thegreatjmat

to get to the pub


----------



## thegreatjmat

to meet his dealer


----------



## SIR****TMG

was lost in the storm


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

To get to the other side ...


----------



## SIR****TMG

I knew that....to get to the other side......


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

To return to the original side ...


----------



## SIR****TMG

to visit GoJoAGoGo


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

to eat some turkey legs


----------



## dotty999

to get stuffed!


----------



## SIR****TMG

to see dotty999


----------



## dotty999

SIR****TMG said:


> to see dotty999


what a compliment though I still feel it wanted a stuffing


----------



## kidcnote

Cuzz she saw a muscle bound Rooster on the other side showing off his Pecks


----------



## SIR****TMG

that my be true


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

To get to the other side


----------



## lexmarks567

Why did the chicken cross the road?

I don't know, why did the chicken cross the road??

To get the New York Times!!!

I don't get it!?!

Neither do I, I get the Daily News!!!


----------



## SIR****TMG

to see the other side


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

cause the chicken wanted to


----------



## lexmarks567

To open a bank account


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

to eat some turkey


----------



## lexmarks567

To burn down KFC


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

To get to the other side ...


----------



## lexmarks567

GoJoAGoGo said:


> To get to the other side ...


*throws rubber chicken at GoJoAGoGo* cluck cluck bok bok cluck cluck bok bok cluck cluck


----------



## kidcnote

To get choked 

http://img8.imagepile.net/img8/36869familypixs694.jpg


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

To get attention


----------



## lexmarks567

To go to divorce court


----------



## SIR****TMG

to meet the rooster


----------



## lexmarks567

she never did.its the goverment.They want you to think she crosed the road.The chickens not real its a robot


----------



## GoJoAGoGo

lexmarks567 said:


> she never did.its the goverment.They want you to think she crosed the road.The chickens not real its a robot


TechChick crossed the road to get reprogrammed ...


----------



## lexmarks567

and to look hotter then she was *wolf whistle*


----------



## The BOBS Fan

Which is worse?

34 forum pages dedicated to the eternal question of why the chicken crossed the road,

or,






Me sitting here for the last hour reading every one of them???


----------



## Schnitzu

The BOBS Fan said:


> Which is worse?
> 
> 34 forum pages dedicated to the eternal question of why the chicken crossed the road,
> 
> or,
> 
> Me sitting here for the last hour reading every one of them???


Had a little time on your hands, did you?


----------



## The BOBS Fan

Schnitz:


> Had a little time on your hands, did you?


Not really. It was one of those times I wanted to post, but wanted to make sure I wasn't repeating another post (I woulda). I almost quit after 10 pages, but then the conversation dropped to 3 people, and I just followed it, waiting for a great ending. Sorta like reading a book, but less educational. Maybe comic book was closer!

Anyway, there was no great ending, and by THAT time, I was so far into it that I thought, gee, what the heck, you know?

Perhaps my situation parallels the chicken! Why did The BOBS Fan read the whole thread? To get to last page!

OK, deep thinkers. I could probably spend the time using that analogy to come with a parallel solution, which could then be applied to the original question. But then I would get famous for figuring out the answer to the 'chicken riddle,' and quite frankly, I'm not prepared for the lifestyle change that would entail (heh). So, I hereby release anyone who does this deed from any personal compensation on my part for the genesis of the method of solution to the problem forever and in perpituity.

Have fun.


----------



## idar

to confuse Bobs, the chicken is darting back and forth across the road.


----------



## The BOBS Fan

AhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!


----------



## SIR****TMG

to miss cars


----------



## Schnitzu

How many mosquitos does it take to screw in a light bulb?

(Two, but I don't know how they got into the light bulb!)


----------



## dking63

514 posts and you _still_ have not come up with a definitive answer? 

Well I think it should be obvious by now that the chicken crossed the road just to drive us nuts trying to figure out why.


----------



## idar

Want a difinitive answer? 
go here for ALL the answers to this question: http://philosophy.eserver.org/chicken.txt


----------



## Tish93

because he felt like it


----------



## The BOBS Fan

Actually, I think I know the answer.

The origin to the thinking used to solve it probably started in zen, and Tish gave me the means to answer it. There is a current school of looking at life and human beings that started way back with Werner Erhard and EST (but today is not near the same philosophy), called Landmark Education. Feel free to look them up.

Many people who do not understand (I was one of them at one time), think it's a culty, brainwashing type of organization, but indeed it is not. They say right away that what they say isn't the truth. They just ask you to think about things in a way we aren't normally conditioned to think about them. The word 'condition' is key there. I don't have the space to explain it all, of course. I'm only trying to allow to to inform yourself of as much or as little about the organization as you wish.

Anyway, I digress!

Why did the chicken cross the road? *Because the chicken crossed the road.*

No meanings, no philosophies. It is just what happened.


----------



## Tish93

wow that was something indeed!


----------



## MAAX Z

Who told you buddy that Chicken have crossed the road ??
I have seen it is where it was before......................................


----------



## Tish93

y did the chicken cross the road.............cus the KFC was was behind him


----------



## idar

Why do we even care why the chicken crossed the road?


----------



## The BOBS Fan

EXACTLY!!! Idar gets it!!


----------



## idar

YIPEE!! I got it!!


----------



## Tish93

the chicken thing is just a "figment of our imagination". In other words it is a "fictional - mcfiction thing", that is just a waste of time!


----------



## The BOBS Fan

But what ISN'T a waste of time? Even time itself!!


----------



## Tish93

well something has an outcome that is better than what started is not a waste of time


----------



## idar

Yesterday I saw a chicken crossing the road. I asked it why. It told me it was none of my business.


----------



## Tish93

happened to u too?? dam, same thing happened to me last week!


----------



## idar

I tried to get a chicken to cross the road, he said "Why?!"


----------



## Tish93

i think thats how mcy d's makes their chicken strips


----------



## idar

"Was that another chicken joke?"


----------



## Tish93

matters how u think of a chicken joke


----------



## idar

cluck cluck


----------



## Tish93

cluck cluck cluck


----------



## idar

Where have all the chickens gone? Did they all cross over?


----------



## Tish93

lol yeah the crossed over. they're in heaven.


----------



## idar

alas poor chickens, I knew them well


----------



## The BOBS Fan

Why did the chicken cross the playground??

To get to the other slide!!


----------



## idar

Was the playground across the road?


----------



## The BOBS Fan

Did it have to be?


----------



## Tish93

why did the chicken commit suicide?

~ to get to the other side.

hahaha! get it?!?! to get to other side you know?!!! haha im great huh.


----------



## idar

A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.


----------



## dking63

BILL GATES : 
I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will
lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book.
Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken This new platform is much
more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% ....... reboot.


----------



## SIR****TMG

to find the rooster


----------



## SIR****TMG

still looking for rooster


----------



## The BOBS Fan

OK, my 9 year old daughter came up with an awesome answer. Dunno if it's unique, but it IS original! If someone already said it, sorry...

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To prove she wasn't CHICKEN!



Well, I liked it, anyway!


----------



## JustJudy

Shamou said:


> because that's where the male chickens were... I had to use *'male chicken' *because the real word would be bleeped out...





SIR****TMG said:


> we don't have MALE chickens in ohio....GOOD GRIEF.............this is a new one


LoL-


----------



## JustJudy

Why did the chicken Jim Morrison cross the road? Answer: To break on through to the other side.


----------



## dking63

What chicken?






*BURP*


----------



## Blacqwolf

_"Why did the chicken cross the road?"_

To make you ask questions.


----------



## KMW

missing her flatmate


----------



## dking63

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well...it was the first thing I grabbed out of my shopping bag to lob back at the little snots throwing rocks at me.


----------



## JustJudy

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud and cross the road again? 

Because she was a dirty double-crosser


----------



## 4N1M4TR1X

did no one notice the chicken was standing in front of KFC? There's the real reason he crossed the road.


----------



## 2twenty2

Why did the chicken cross the road? She was afraid someone would caesar!


----------



## JustJudy

I found the real reason!!! <Click this!!


----------



## 2twenty2

That is


----------



## Blu_86

Because the road was there


----------



## indeepcrap

To observe how infuriated the road would really be! 

Get it? Cross the road? 

On another note, if it were the chicken crossing the beach, it was so it could get to the other tide. 

But the one I like the best is: In the words of Sun Tzu - to know itself and what made it tick. 

Or...if the chicken were in Africa, to get away from the lion pride, lest it died ( a premature death).

Or if it were in Kentucky, USA - to escape from being fried. 

Lastly, if it were the kangaroo courts of China - to get away from being unfairly tried. 

And if it were a tad demented - to get a bus ride.


----------



## dking63

I can't believe that this thread has survived this long


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## dking63

I can't believe that this thread has survived for 16 years


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## 2twenty2

I can't believe the chicken crossed the road to begin with


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## Noyb

Florida ?? 
Just to prove to the Armadillo that it is possible


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## RT

Perhaps there was an organically raised chick...
born naturally, but raised without eggspectations... in search of her phone...


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## JustJudy

RT- Very punny! 
I now think it was for social distancing- some chickens got too close- so....


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## cwwozniak

If this is on Schrödinger Road, the chicken wanted to find out if it could cross and not cross the road at the same time.


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## 2twenty2




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## RT

Do we know for sure if the chicken actually DID cross the road?

Might have encountered some obstacles...


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## 2twenty2

Numerous chickens have tried, but never made it


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## RT

My chicken went nuts, tried crossing the damn road, now partially residing in the market...it's a fresh market.
Only sells chicken that died from natural causes...


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## GoJoAGoGo

Saw a hot hen on the other side


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## 2twenty2

that side, this side, any side


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## RT

Kinda sorta embarrased to say (I know not why) growing up, we raised chickens for eggs and then was Sunday dinner.
Dad dispatched one, while I chased a headless chicken across the damn road, avoiding traffic, esp the school bus.
Driven by Arthur, my Grandma's boy friend.

so there's all ya need to know about that road and the anonymous_ gallus domesticus _who if given a name would've become a pet.

And pretty sure that comment can't be considered a gameplay, _per se,_ but I did mention road and chicken.

Feel free to carry on as you'all see fit


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## JustJudy

Hi RT!!

She crossed the road because she thought it was an egg-cellent idea! 🐓


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## RT

Hi JJ, long time no see!

After the chicken watched _The Matrix_ spoon bend scene, 
realized...
there is no road...


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## dking63

Because the Covid-19 vaccine shots were over there.


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## JustJudy

She crossed the road because she would be able to see the parade better from that side.


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## RT

I think I saw chicken painting safety lines on the road ,
then suddenly, there the blast of a horn...

and feathers floating  👎


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## 2twenty2

To catch the bus 🚌 to go on vacation 🏕⛺ because she was egghausted from layin eggs and needed time off


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## RT

I think the one I saw was running across the road to avoid so called "chicken war" amongst the fast food chains


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## dking63

My god! Is this stupid thread still alive? 

Because he was blind drunk and staggered across the road.


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## RT

dking63 said:


> My god! Is this stupid thread still alive?


It's only alive because you posted here, brought it to our attention!
  

Having chased chickens in my youth, I now think that it flew across the road for some unknown reason.
I've seen a chicken fly ~12 feet...


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## JustJudy

A bit political, but humorous nonetheless


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## RT

"Judy Just" may have made the longest post here 

I did have a chicken in the fridge, starting to spoil...
so I tossed it across the road, the chicken had no choice...
 👣


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## JustJudy

RT said:


> "Judy Just" may have made the longest post here


I see what you did there 

I think the chicken crossed the road to get a better look at RT's brilliant wordsmithing!


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## cwwozniak

Here are a few to add Just Judy's list, from Harvard College Department of Physics (more at https://www.physics.harvard.edu/undergrad/humor):

_Albert Einstein: _The chicken did not cross the road. The road passed beneath the chicken.

_Isaac Newton: _Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross roads.

_Erwin Schrodinger: _The chicken doesn't cross the road. Rather, it exists simultaneously on both sides…..just don't peek.

_Nicolaus Copernicus: _The chicken was moving at a slightly different orbital speed around the sun.

_Galileo Galilei: _The chicken crossed the road because it put one foot in front of the other and took a sufficient number of steps to traverse a distance greater than or equal to the road's width. Note that the reason is not because the earth is the center of the universe. Oh, great… another jail term.


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## JustJudy

Dr. Emmet Brown answered this with: “Roads? Where we’re going, we don’t need roads.”


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## 2twenty2

The chicken crossed the road to get to the "chicken by the sea"


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## RT

Chickens?...
WE ain't got any stinkin' chickens...
We don't need no stinkin' chickens...
I ain't got to show you any stinkin' chickens...

But there's one over there, across the road,
Apparently no witnesses survived.
Stinks, too.


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## RT

JustJudy said:


> Dr. Emmet Brown answered this with: "Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads."


Judy, that reminds of the movie "Paul."
When Paul takes Blythe Danner's character with him at the end, she says she forgot her toothbrush. Paul responds, "Baby, where we're going, you don't need teeth,"


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## JustJudy

RT said:


> Judy, that reminds of the movie "Paul."
> When Paul takes Blythe Danner's character with him at the end, she says she forgot her toothbrush. Paul responds, "Baby, where we're going, you don't need teeth,"


RT, and that reminded me of a conversation I overheard where a guy said he had a chicken that could count her eggs. The other guy said, "you're joking!"
And he said, "No, she's a mathamachicken!"


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## RT

JustJudy said:


> RT, and that reminded me of a conversation I overheard


Hey Double Jay 
So you "overheard" that...?
Sounds like there's something fowl going on


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## JustJudy

RT said:


> Hey Double Jay
> So you "overheard" that...?
> Sounds like there's something fowl going on


And it is even more fowl when you know that not only did the chicken cross the road, but the road double crossed the chicken!


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## RT

JustJudy said:


> but the road double crossed the chicken!


I cry Fowl Play!
You see, I just noticed my rooster ran across the road because he was hen pecked


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## JustJudy

Hopefully this will give you a smile


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